Return to Basic

I need to stay in the library till the end.
Reflecting my high school study pattern, I was just sitting in cubicles all day and not achieving much. I don't know why I didn't recognize the problem and tried to solve, but now the important thing is that do I recognize the problem and attempt to do something to cure it.
Yes, I am beginning to change myself; I'm starting a work that has never done before in my life. I was browsing over Calvin website which has a great Calvin students' pictures; I felt pain because I wasn't one of them (my picture wasn't there).

Currently, I don't know which way will work best for me in terms of my career.
I don't even know marketing works best for me although I've been talking about it to others and myself.

I feel like crying; I have been sitting on this place for more than 2 hours but I wasn't able to finish two simple 100 essay questions. Is this not my calling for life? Should I go back to S. Korea? I don't know why I'm staying in the US, and doing nothing. What area of life should I be working on?




Today, a big striking lesson has occurred to me.
Need to pay attention to my diligence or assiduous level.
Go back to my basic!
How?
By sitting at a library all day long!
Something will happen if that happens today!

What else should I do to go back to my basic or basic of life that God has intended for me to do?
Read the Bible, pray, and give thanks to Him.

Although I feel hopeless, Father, help me to gain strenghs.
Here's a thing; since I am not stable and persistent right now, it will be dangerous if I pursue a relationship with a girl. Thus, although it may be painful not pursuing a close relationship, I need to resign my desire and anxiousness in pursuing it. God helping me!


기본으로 돌아가라


"산에서 길을 잃으면 골짜기를 헤매지 말고,
높은 곳으로 올라가라"라는 말이 있다.
높은 곳에 올라가면, 길이 보인다.
무슨 뜻인가?
'기본으로 돌아가라'는 말이다.
방향을 잃었을 때 북극성을 보듯이,
기본으로 돌아가면 길이 보인다.


- 전병욱의《영적강자의 조건》중에서 -